If you read nothing else in this series, this is the post I want you to read.
While I’m sure all of us will continually struggle to keep those commitments to ourselves that I talked about yesterday, I don’t think that’s really our biggest problem with fear.
I always thought the reason I didn’t reach out and face my fears was in large part because I wasn’t where I needed to be personally yet. I don’t have my act together. Of course I want to face my fears. Of course I won’t let them rule my life. Of course I’ll step out and conquer those fears.
Yes, very soon.
Just as soon as I get my life a little bit more together. I just need to build my confidence a little more. I’m just so flawed. Of course I’ll never be perfect, but I could be far better. I can be at least about as good as most people I know.
Once I lose just a few more pounds, I’ll feel so much better about myself. I won’t feel so self conscious in social settings. Then I’ll have the courage to join a gym and jog in races with my friends. Not quite yet, but soon.
Once I get this blogging thing down a little better, then I’ll be able to go to a blog conference. I just need to become a little more consistent with blog posting and grow my blog a little more. Then I’ll have the confidence to attend a conference like Allume. Not quite yet, but soon.
I really want to reach out and try to help a friend who is struggling. First I just need to get my own act together a little bit more. After all who wants help from some girl who doesn’t even have the self-discipline to follow through on her commitment to get up at 5am each morning to work out? Once I get the self-discipline thing down, then I’ll have the confidence to really reach and really try to help others. Not quite yet, but soon.
At the beginning of each year a lot of people make those infamous things called “resolutions.” I must admit, I’m no exception. Come January each year, I find myself making the same resolutions I’ve made each year, vowing that somehow this year will be different that all the years before when I’ve ditched the resolutions by March. This year I really will lose at least 30 pounds. This year I really will clear out my junk area. This year I’ll stop procrastinating. This will be the year that I finally acquire the self discipline that I’ve been so sorely lacking. The saddest part of all that is that I really do believe myself.
Don’t get me wrong. All those things I just mentioned. They are important. We should work on them.
But this year I did something different. I didn’t make resolutions to lose weight, or clear out junk, or stop procrastinating, or any of those lofty goals. I made only one promise to myself. It was this:
I will stop letting fear rule my life. Fear will no longer hold me back. It’s not going to be the reason I don’t do something. I will always ask myself the question, “What would I do if I weren’t afraid?” and then I’ll do that. I won’t be perfect at it, but I’ll keep on trying.
And you know what? It’s October 18, and that’s a resolution I’m still keeping. No, I haven’t gotten my act all together, I have a huge list of things I need to change about myself, but I’m done with letting fear have a huge hold on my life.
Still not convinced that right now is the time to conquer your fears? Allow me to present you with logical arguments:
One, if you wait – until you are perfect or whatever version of perfect you think is realistically attainable for you – to start conquering your fears, you’ll never get there. So, please, don’t wait.
Two, even if you could attain whatever level of “perfection” you think is realistic and necessary, your fears will still be there. Yes, your confidence will be increased by meeting your goals, but your fears won’t completely leave. You really will have to face them sometime – why not start now?
Three, you will miss out on so much if you wait until you have it all together. I shudder to think all I would have missed out on if I were still waiting to conquer my junk food problem or improve my self discipline before I was willing to step outside my comfort zone.
Four, it’s a two way street. You will find that conquering your fears will actually make it easier to work on all those other goals in your life. You’ll have more motivation.
So, who’s with me? It’s time to stop waiting until we are perfect to start conquering our fears. <-(Tweet this)
You can read the whole series about overcoming fear here.
This post is linked to Thriving Thursdays.